Happy 12 weeks babies!! I just can't believe we have twin boys and they are 12 weeks old. I was talking to James about it today...it's just amazing. I went through the pregnancy, through the delivery, through the recovery, loved them instantly and somehow it still feels unreal. They are beautiful babies that just make us the happiest two people in the world. Do I know how incredibly blessed I am? Every moment that I look at them I know I am looking at a piece of heaven.
Now that I'm finished being mooshy gooshy....
This week I started packing away the maternity clothes. Yeah Baby!! Not all of my clothes fit, but it seems that each day something new fits. It all doesn't fit well enough to wear out. Some yes, but not all. I'm thrilled nonetheless. I did manage to fit back into my favorite jeans!! Wednesday was my first day of wearing a whole outfit that was mine prepregnancy. That's right, first day of not wearing a single maternity item. Let me tell you just how excited I was!! Now I have the room in my closet to get out all of my real clothes and organize them. I'm interested to see what fall clothes fit. My favorite season is fall and my favorite thing to wear is a quarter sleeve shirt with jeans.
My sister bought a new house and moved in over the Labor Day weekend. It is a beautiful house. I took the boys over to see it on Monday. It's a good thing she bought it too because the day she took me over to see it, Ethan spit up on the carpet. Granted we cleaned it up and it basically blended into the carpet anyway, but he wanted to christen the house. In visiting their house, it has inspired me to finish decorating our house. Two weeks after we moved in we found out I was pregnant so that took over and decorating came to a halt. The only room in the house that is completely finished/decorated is the nursery. I have things to go on walls, we've just not had a chance or made the time (pre-babies) to hang them. Along with that, we've had a hard time keeping rooms clean lately. My goal: once a room is clean....KEEP IT THAT WAY! It's just so easy to leave something out with everything else going on demanding time.
Tomorrow is a big day for me. When I found out I was pregnant my hair was short. After 9 months of taking prenatals and not cutting it, it obviously grew out. Well, after much consideration and chickening out each time before, I've decided to finally chop my hair. I'm going for the style Jen Anniston had in season 7 of FRIENDS when she chopped her hair. I don't know if it will look good on me, but I'm going to do it anyway. I've always wanted to do it but was too afraid to do something out of my comfort zone. My comfort zone = plain. I will probably not like it at first because it will be so different than the mop that is my hair now, but I'm sure after a few days I'll grow to love it. At least I hope so :) It's just hair. It will grow back. I just hope James likes it. With the transition that my body is in now, I don't want to take anything away from the sexy that he manages to see.
I've experienced some frustration this week. James has been called out twice now after hours to deal with stupid stuff. I get frustrated that other people's stupidity and poor choices pulls him away from his family. Yes I know it's the nature of the job, but it doesn't make it any easier. I feel bad for him too. I know he doesn't want to leave and I don't want my reaction to make it harder on him. It's very hard for me to keep my feelings in, but I'm working on it. When he goes off to work after hours, I don't want him to be worried about leaving me to handle things on my own when he should be focusing on his safety. Because he was called out Monday night he was out all night and all day Tuesday so Tuesday night he wanted to sleep, rightfully so. That meant two days straight of no help, no break. It was a rough week because they boys wouldn't take a full nap so they'd wake up fussy and stay fussy until their next feeding and that takes a toll. I've gotten soooo much better at being patient when they cry, but my patience have been thin this week. To make matters worse....no mother wants to hear her baby cry. It breaks my heart when they're crying and I can't get them to stop because I just want to make it better. But one thing I've learned over the last 12 weeks, when Lucas gets very mad, his screams are at a certain pitch that hurts my right ear so much that I feel like my eardrum is going to bust or bleed. It's awful. I feel horrible, but I want to cry when he cries that way. It is literally painful and sometimes it's hard for me to focus more on him than on the discomfort I feel. Of course if they're both crying Lucas gets handled first every time in my attempt to silence the screams leaving Ethan to wait. However, Ethan cries to be held more often so I guess they're kind of even.
Uncle Griffin brought up a point a couple of weeks ago. At what age do babies/infants have jealous feelings? It seems, sometimes, that if one of the babies is crying and I pick him up, no matter how content the other one was he will just look at me and start crying. It's almost as if they're saying to me, "I want to be held, why aren't you holding me?" I've not bothered to look this up, but it seems too convenient that once I'm holding one the other will look at me with big eyes and just start crying. It's almost comical sometimes. I guess this is something I really should look up dealing with two babies.
In non baby related news (I realize I'm going on for a long time, but I've not had the chance to blog in a long while) I watched GLEE after So You Think You Can Dance and I loved it!! Maybe it's because I was in show choir all 4 years of high school and it reminds me of that in a way. I just laughed when they did Kanye's "Gold Digger" and Salt-n-Peppa's "Push It". The girl who has the lead role musically has a beautiful voice. The lead high school guy looks like Chris Kline and I'm fine with that :) I'm super pumped that The Office starts on Thursday.
It's almost midnight and I'm exhausted. Think I'm going to forego waiting on the husband to get home and just get in bed.
2 hours ago